The Experiment
by Efilas
Summary: Rin cannot help but notice that despite her lord's blood-matted hair and wounded, battered body, the ethereal pale beauty never leaves Sesshomaru. She longs to reach out to his perfectly sculpted cheekbone, to trace the perpendicular stripes which ascend from his jaw under his delicately pointed elven ears. To soothe his burning hot skin with her cool touch. AU/Feudal/Kagome's era.
1. Introduction

Introduction

" _Lord Sesshomaru!_ "

Her chilling scream resounds around the forest, the eerie ring juxtaposed with the otherwise silent autumn night. His first instinct is to run to Rin's aid, the adrenaline pumping through his veins at the sound of her distressed cry, but the shock he feels as the blade plunges through his chest armor and into his icy heart momentarily paralyzes him.

The demon standing before him chuckles bitterly before everything seems to go silent; time completely stops. Sesshomaru's world begins to spin. Black dots form in front of his eyes. He feels no pain, just nauseated as the overpowering smell of his own blood hits his sharp nose… but how? How could someone like Sesshomaru be put in such a position? ' _Is this how I die?_ ' he asks himself. ' _So… undignified?_ ' Suddenly, time moves forward again - but this time his senses are heightened, even more so than usual, as the physical, animalistic need to survive sets in. The air, the smell of Rin's tears, the rapid beating of Inuyasha's heart, Jaken's repetitive, shocked blinking, and the sound of Inuyasha's crew gasping in unison pierces his sensitive eardrums.

A light breeze passes by, gathering the crisp, freshly fallen leaves in its gentle embrace. The sound is deafening.

"Pathetic dog. It's about time someone wiped that condescending look off of your face," the wrinkled demon says in its guttural voice, his putrid breath hitting the dog demon's forehead as he spoke. Despite its leathery, skeletal body, the demon is strong. Strong enough to pierce the Lord Sesshomaru with its sword, to make him bleed, to make him bow before him in defeat as his blade punctures him. "I am done playing."

Sesshomaru grunts through his clenched teeth. Though he feels no pain, he is finding it difficult to breathe. " _Die,"_ his enemy growls, punctuating the last word as he drives the rest of the blade through his chest with a truly sickening sound, until the hilt of the demon's sword is pressed flush against him. Sesshomaru's body bows forward, his clawed fingers coming up to wrap around the other demon's scrawny wrist. His white hair, stained in deep crimson, splays over his face. His bangs conceal his copper eyes. His blood… warm and sticky… leaving his body, pouring out of him. His grip is light as he feels life begin to abandon him.

"No… no… no…" a familiar voice begins to chant, only feet away from him. "No… _Don't leave me. Don't leave me… Don't leave me."_

"F-foolish girl. Cry-crying will only humiliate Lord Ses-Sesshomaru more," another familiar voice replies through tears. Jaken. His words come out bitterly, but in reality, he is only trying to console the girl... Rin.

His words fail to quell her emotions as hysteria begins to take over. She grasps the sides of her head as she begins to shake, falling to her knees with a soft thud. He is dead. He has left her and now she has no one. He is dead. Her Lord Sesshomaru. No. No. He can't be. He cannot leave her!

' _Has she no faith in my abilities?'_

Anger as dark and as red as the blood that mars his flesh washes over him. The sound of Rin's whimpering makes his grip tighten on the filthy demon's wrist. The magenta stripes that highlight his high cheekbones and slender yet sturdy wrists become ragged as the air around him picks up, lifting his white bangs to reveal his raging crimson eyes. A snarl passes through his lips, tight against his white, bared fangs. His poisonous claws glow green and seeps through the demon's skin as his grasp around its wrist tightens. Despite Sesshomaru's growing strength, the demon raises its leg and press the sole of its foot into the dog demon's armored stomach, seemingly unbothered by the poisonous claws digging into it. Using its weathered appendage as leverage, the demon yanks its blood and flesh covered weapon from Sesshomaru's body with all of its might.

The white haired man growls, stumbling back as he covers the wound on his chest with his fingers. His other hand raises before him, claws expanding, fingers rigid, as his transformation begins. His long white hair flows behind him as he crouches, a truly wounded animal. He just barely notices the sound of his half brother unsheathing his sword as he comes to his elder brother's aid, and doesn't even notice that Rin has stopped whimpering.

' _Stay out of this, half-breed._ ' The last coherent thought sweeps through his mind before instinct floods his senses. To kill. That is all the Lord Sesshomaru knows in that moment as his true form emerges.

* * *

A/N: I just want to say that I have only recently started rewatching Inuyasha. I have always been infatuated with Sesshomaru. He's so beautiful! But yeah, recently I have been reading a lot of Sesshomaru/older Rin fics and I suddenly had an idea for one of my own! I'm sorry if my writing is a bit rusty, or if some things don't make sense or if the grammar or storryline is wrong! I think if I continue this story I will revise it later on. But please leave reviews and give me honest, constructive criticism! But please don't be mean! I won't be able to take it, haha.

If any of the character seem OOC or whatever please let me know! And hopefully the plot won't be cliche? I don't _think_ it's been done yet… it's a pretty weird idea as some of you will see if I write more chapters… but I don't know, I'm just worried. Just let me know, okay? Erg. Okay, I will shut up now. Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 1

**Warning: This chapter contains sexually explicit content.**

* * *

Chapter 1: Control

"My lord."

The young woman falls to her knees, clasping her hands together under her chin in desperation. Her lips tremble at the all too familiar sight of her lord Sesshomaru helplessly sprawled out before her. This time, however, is different. Unlike last time, she cannot offer him a jug of water; this time, she cannot offer him fish she has caught from the lake; this time, he cannot haughtily reject her kind gestures under the guise of disliking human food. He is unconscious.

And despite it all, Rin cannot help but notice that Sesshomaru's ethereal pale beauty shines brightly even through his blood-matted hair and wounded, battered body. His cracked armor and weapons are nowhere to be found on his person, having been removed upon arrival at Kaede's village. His white garb and pelt has been removed from his arms and now pools around his hips, revealing his slender, yet muscular upper body.

A blood stained bandage is wrapped tightly around his torso, the pelt resting beneath his head. The agony is etched into his features, his eyebrows furrowing in discomfort even in his unconscious state. Rin longs to reach out to his perfectly sculpted cheekbone, to trace the perpendicular stripes which ascend from his jaw under his delicately pointed elven ears. To soothe his burning hot skin with her cool touch and comfort him through the pain he feels. How she wishes to cup his face in her hands, the way she always did when they were alone.

But she cannot. Although Sesshomaru is everything to Rin - her protector, her confidante, her lover, even - she will not humiliate her lord in an act of selfish affection. For the past year until recently, Rin had lied to herself about the relationship she and Sesshomaru shared: she insisted that their love - did he even love her? - was not a _secret_ , it was merely _private_ … but it became impossible for her to keep denying Sesshomaru's true feelings about their relationship. He was, and is, ashamed. It explained why he only came to her at night; why he only pressed his lips to hers when no one else was around. It was why whenever she woke up in the morning tangled in her sheets, he was not tangled in them with her - his delicious scent and the bruises scattered over her body the only evidence of their lovemaking the night before.

She stares at Sesshomaru's limp body guiltily, remembering one night in particular.

Last night.

For a moment, she had thought… perhaps she deserved better.

Perhaps she deserved a man who did not loathe her humanity.

She closed her eyes angrily, letting the memory reset, rewind.

 _~flashback~_

He was back. He never bothered telling her when or where he was going, but he was finally back. He always left, only to return weeks later in the night to get the one and only thing he wanted from her.

"I'm not a..." she trailed off, mumbling into her pillow. Her hands curled into fists in the bed sheets. The moonlight shone through her open window, illuminating her curled up figure and the light blue sleeping kimono that adorned her skinny, yet feminine body.

There she was, crying herself to sleep as she waited for the Lord of the Western Lands to accompany her in her bedroom. Tonight, however, she was prepared to give him a piece of her mind. She would not let him seduce her into submission, into a lust-filled stupor. Though she rarely disobeyed him or dissented his authority, she had stayed up all night thinking about what she would say to him, anticipating his return.

She sleepily wiped her tears away, only to let more spill from her puffy, red eyes moments later. Yawning, she pulled the sheets up over her shivering form.

It was pointless. Lord Sesshomaru would never love her as she loved him. She thought of the monk who had saved her and the other children from that cave those many moons ago; how he had warned her not to leave with a demon. Although Lord Sesshomaru never physically hurt her, the emotional pain she felt then and there was real, and it hurt. Maybe demons and humans weren't meant to live in the same world, after all. But did she really want to go back to her own kind? The very thought of it made her scoff. Human beings would always be flawed beyond comprehension.

Humans were the ones who had ruthlessly murdered her parents.

What was she even thinking? Maybe the problem did not lie within Lord Sesshomaru, or demons, or humanity, or anyone else: maybe the problem lied within herself. Maybe _she_ was the problem. Maybe everyone else would be better off if she simply...

She felt a hand gently squeeze her arm and gasped, frightened. She shot up in bed and turned around to see who her intruder was, but then laughed spitefully, putting her own hand over her heart in an attempt its erratic beating. "Lord Sesshomaru… you startled me. I didn't hear you come in."

Despite travelling and living with Sesshomaru for most of her life, his cat-like stealth never failed to bewilder her. He was silent, predatory, and she loved him so.

She wiped the tears from her face with the back of her arm and crossed her legs on the futon. Although sitting with her legs criss-crossed in her short sleeping kimono would be considered unladylike by most people's' standards, she didn't care. She was a free spirit, firstly, not to mention that there wasn't any part of Rin's body that Sesshomaru hadn't already seen.

She looked up at her lover, who was covered in white moonlight. 'He is so breathtaking,' Rin thought to herself. 'And here I am, all disheveled and wild.'

His posture was as straight as ever, his chin tilted downward at her as his stare bore into hers. The natural curve of his slightly downturned lips begged her to abandon her dignity, throw her arms around his neck, and kiss him senseless. His hair was oh so white and pure, but in the moonlight it shone with undertones of blue… little Rin would always be awestruck by his beauty.

Having already discarded his armor, swords, and yellow obi, probably when he had first arrived back to the castle, Rin raised a delicate hand to finger a small, loose thread on his white kimono. He must have been fighting, she thought vaguely. She battled the urge to slide her hand in between the folds of his garb and feel his warm, hard stomach, but…

She sniffled as a tear rolled down her flushed cheek, splashing onto her bare thigh. She could feel Sesshomaru's gaze burn into the top of her head, could feel one of his long, elegant fingers twirling a lock of her brown hair - right where she always used to wear that childish side ponytail of hers. His dangerously sharp claws so near her flesh... Rin knew he could kill her, but she wasn't afraid.

She knew he hated the sight and the smell of her tears, but his pride would not allow him to ask her what was wrong. He was certain her tears fell because of him.

She sighed in defeat, but refused to look up at him.

She gently pushed her hands into his kimono, separating the fabric to expose the porcelain skin that stretched tightly around his toned stomach and chest. Rin flattened her palms out on his muscular stomach, sliding them up to his ribs. Her heart leapt as she felt his bones, hidden beneath sinew and snowy white skin. It was times like these when the inuyoukai seemed so… human to Rin. It was times like these when she felt like his equal; like he was just as fragile as she. There was a skeleton under this flesh. There was a beating heart. There were lungs, enabling him to breathe. But when she finally looked up into the cold, intelligent, and haunting amber gaze of her lover… she had to wonder - was he capable of feeling love, like humans were? Was the bravado and the ice and the stoicism all just an act as she had previously thought, or was he really so heartless? She grabbed his waist in her small hands and pulled gently, urging him to step closer. Her hands slid down his sides to rest on his hips, firmly tracing the magenta stripes which wrapped around them with her thumbs. He languidly rolled his shoulders back, letting his kimono slide off completely now. He dropped it carelessly on the bed, next to Rin, exposing his upper body to her.

As angry as she was, she couldn't resist...

Rin uncrossed her legs slowly, spreading them so Sesshomaru could stand between them. He continued to play with her hair, tangling his fingers in her brown tresses, but now his hand rested on the back of her head as he toyed with her locks - always in control.

"Sesshomaru…" she sighed as her eyes slid shut. "My lord… You're beautiful."

She promised herself she wouldn't, but it was happening.

She was losing control.

He would always win.

She slowly pressed her burning lips just below his navel. Her hands remained on his hips as she pulled away slightly, her pink mouth ghosting lower, lower, _lower._..

She was wrapped around his demonic finger, a simple marionette for him to control when he got bored.

A gentle open-mouthed kiss was pressed to his hard stomach… lower…

 _His pet._

Her fingers trailed further down his hips where she tucked them into the waistband of his hakama, pulling down, only slightly...

 _Nothing more._

She trailed her mouth lower, nuzzling the silver hair just above…

 _She wanted him._

Suddenly, her eyes snapped open and she leaned her forehead against his abdomen.

"Do you care for me, my lord?" she questioned, her voice just above a whisper. He stopped playing with her hair, suddenly. After several moments of silence, she whispered, "do you love me?"

Silence.

Rin began to wonder if he even heard what she had asked, but he had to have - he was a demon, after all; his hearing was so sharp… and suddenly, the hand that had been resting on the back of her head dropped to his side.

She moved her forehead off of his hot skin but did not look up at him. Rather, she stared despondently at his navel, wishing he would just _speak._

"Rin, why do you ask such foolish questions?" he finally replied in his gentle, yet monotonous voice.

His reply was to be expected. Had she still been in denial about their relationship at that point, she would have taken his response as a yes to her questions. She had always believed he had his own unique way of saying he loved her. But now that she could see clearly, she knew that his answer meant no. This mental gymnastics he played with her, answering a question with a question of his own, was only played so he would not have to pick up the pieces of her after he broke her heart. So he would not have to be responsible with the feelings of a pathetic human.

How could she have been so stupid? She was merely his… his...

"I cannot do this anymore," she whispered. Anger and sadness began to cloud her vision, hot tears splashing onto her hands which were now folded in her lap, but her face remained flat. She would not allow it to scrunch up like it had before. Suddenly, she leaned back on her elbows, staring boldly into the demon lord's golden eyes, before confidently she said, "I'm not a whore."

And with that statement, Rin allowed her expression to convey the rage she felt toward her lord. She picked up the white top her secret lover had apathetically tossed beside her and rolled it up as quickly as her human arms would allow. She threw his now bunched up kimono at his chest, letting it fall to the ground with a soft thud. He did not recoil or furrow his eyebrows in confusion; he did not yell at her, though she thought he might. Disgusted at his response, or lack thereof, she unwrapped her legs from his and turned around on her side, facing away from him and scowling angrily at the wall.

Though maybe he did love her, now that she thought about it, because if anyone else had pulled a stunt like that on the great and powerful lord Sesshomaru, they wouldn't have lived to see another second.

But she doubted it.

She struggled to maintain her composure, prepared for what would happen next. She yelped loudly as the dog demon flipped her onto her back so quickly that it made her stomach drop and disoriented her momentarily. Her hands were suddenly curled into fists above her head, Sesshomaru's strong fingers pinning her wrists down to the futon. His thighs flanked her hips now - trapping her beneath his weight, but not hurting her. His white hair hung over her, tickling her neck and draping over her clothed shoulders. Rin struggled to pull her wrists free from his grasp, but failed miserably.

"That wasn't the welcome home I was expecting, Rin." She visibly shivered as he said her name in his deep, velvety voice. He spoke slowly, with purpose.

"What exactly _were_ you expecting, milord?" she spat, glowering at the chillingly beautiful man above her. Her heart ached for him… she wanted nothing more than for him to take her, right then and there - hard and fas- NO. Gods, she was so weak! "I will not simply be your whore, Lord Sesshomaru."

He narrowed his eyes at her, however his aloof expression did not reveal the surprise he felt at Rin's words. Swiftly, he moved his right hand away from her wrist, his left one gathering them both above her head. Elegantly, slowly, he raised his right hand to his hair and used the back of a clawed index finger to move a strand of silver away from his face, tucking it behind his ear so as to get a better look at her. Her eyes were hard, angry… and his little Rin's anger was directed at him. Her arms still rendered useless in his grasp, he stroked the side of her face with his palm. He let his hand wander from her face, down her neck, between her breasts. He leaned in, just barely trailing his lips over the collarbone jutting out of the collar of her kimono. She writhed beneath him, demanding that he stop. He feigned obedience, halting the trail of ghost kisses he left over her for but a moment before he leaned in closer and continued again, pressing firm, slow kisses to her neck. The sound of his moist lips against her flesh, his warm breath seeping over her… Her eyelids began to slide shut as she stopped resisting, breathing heavily, riding her arousal... until she felt his wicked smirk press into her pulse.

"Stop!" She shouted, stiffening. This time, he listened and moved his head up to stare intently into her eyes… never letting go of her wrists.

It was then that Rin's resolve crumbled. Melancholy contorted her face; rivers of tears flowed from her eyes, her lover but a haze above her now.

"Why - why can't we just be together, my lord?" she said in between sobs. "It's because you don't love me, isn't it?! Why do you only come to me in the night like... like I'm some kind of - some kind of cheap-"

Gently, Sesshomaru covered her shouting mouth with his right hand, leaning in to whisper into her delicate ear. "Silence, Rin." Her sobs were muffled by his palm. He did not want the other youkai who served him in his estate to awaken, to hear with their sensitive ears, to discover their secret. Feeling the anger rise inside of him, he seethed into her ear, "this is what you agreed to, girl. A mortal and a demon: you know it is sinful. Do you wish to bring shame upon this Sesshomaru?"

She was gasping now. She loved him so much, with all of her being, and he was ashamed of her!

"Do you wish to bring shame upon this Sesshomaru, Rin?" he repeatedly angrily, voice just above a whisper now.

Hesitantly, the young woman shook her head no, choking back her sobs.

Sesshomaru's tense body relaxed and he released his grip on her wrists, moving his other hand from her mouth to wipe the tears from her face. She continued to whimper and sniffle, but his gentle caresses began to calm her.

"Are there others?" she choked out.

"Others?"

She nodded slowly, averting her gaze to his chest.

"Are there other… you know, women?" she continued.

He curled his lip at the thought.

"Ridiculous," he snapped, genuinely insulted. "There is only you, Rin."

Her weeping ceased all together, and he moved to lie in between her thighs now. She wrapped her legs around his waist, feeling her kimono hike up. She didn't care anymore. She was hurt, yes, but she needed him.

Needed his touch.

She touched his face, tracing the stripes there as she always did, and trailed her frail, human fingers over his sharp, masculine jaw, down the delicate curve of his neck, and over his strong, muscled shoulder.

'Who am I kidding?' she thought as she threw her arms around his neck and pulled him into a long, deep kiss.

He gladly returned her affection.

He always won.

She pushed her tongue passed his lips, which Sesshomaru gladly allowed. His mouth was so warm and inviting… his tongue was like velvet, so different from the rest of him, which was tough like iron. The couple closed their eyes, greedily exchanging breaths, and sighs, and soft moans. Occasionally they stopped to stare into each other's eyes, before continuing to lock lips even more fervently than before.

She needed this… Not sex, not petting… _This_ **.** She needed his body on top of hers, his lips dominating her own, his strong, demon body protecting her fragile, human shell. The last of her tears dried.

Although she knew he'd be gone by morning, at that moment, she felt loved. These secret touches with him, with her lord, were ephemeral, so she had to make the best of it.

Sesshomaru pulled his mouth away from hers, smiling inwardly: her lips were wet with his saliva. He brushed such thoughts aside. "I am leaving tomorrow afternoon. If you wish to follow me, I shall not stop you."

Her soft smile of adoration suddenly turned into a grin. "Okay," she whispered, out of breath. In her head, she was screaming in excitement.

"Jaken and Ah-Un will be accompanying us," Sesshomaru stated, a rare, but small, smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"I don't care," Rin laughed. "I just need to be by your side."

 _~end flashback~_

For a fleeting moment, Rin had thought that maybe she had deserved better. But such things do not matter now, not anymore. If her lover's affections were only showed in secret moments, then so be it. After all, demons and mortals lived in different worlds. She just needs him here, alive. She owes him everything she has to offer.

He was the only one who truly ever cared, and to think she had started to question his ability to feel compassion. Stupid, stupid, stupid. How could she have been so fucking stupid?!

When she was simply a little girl, nobody else had bothered to ask her about the bruises - but he did. When nobody else wanted to save her, to protect her from the wolves that ripped through her village, he did - he brought her back, even. When nobody else wanted to take her in, he did. She owed him her life. She was such a burden to him, and yet he looked after her all of these years.

On those nights that he snuck into her chambers, when her menstrual cycle caused her to curl up in agony, he would gently rub the small of her back, willing the pain to go away.

When she picked him flowers in the garden, he did not toss them to the side like Jaken did. Even if Sesshomaru did not particularly care for flowers, he always accepted them when Rin gave them to him. To this day, she still picks him flowers.

When she blathered on about something, Lord Sesshomaru never told her to shut up, or told her that she was foolish; he never ignored her or walked away like others of her kind often had; he had always listened silently, simply enjoying her presence.

Those who see her lord as merely a cold-hearted demon are deeply mistaken.

"You are kind," she whispers brokenly, "and gentle. You can't leave me."

Her fingers twitch, itching to hold his hand in hers.

"Please, wake up."

* * *

 **A/N:** This chapter was going to be way longer, and wasn't originally going to contain anything sexual, but I am sooo freaking tired and don't have the energy to write more and this is just how it ended up... I don't think I like how this turned out. There are probably a lot of mistakes, and it's probably rushed, and they're probably OOC... but hey, I'll let you be the judge of that.

But yeaaaaah, after the next chapter, the chapter after that is going to be _really_ weird, I think. It'll be set in Kagome's era... I might change the summary of this story tbh. It's definitely Rin/Sesshomaru, but I feel like the plot is just kind of strange. Eh, again... I'll let the reader be the judge of that! I'm really nervous about posting this because I'm not happy with it, but I hope you enjoyed. And thanks soooo much to those who reviewed! I appreciate it so much.

I will probably come back and revise this chapter and add a lil dictionary thing like someone suggested, but I'm going to bed right now. Goodnight~


End file.
